I actually felt a little tingle of desire today. It’s been a loooong time since I’ve thought, “I want cock.” Even when I have talked and teased and played with Viper, it’s mostly Baldy (or some other vibe) that’s got me there – I haven’t been filled with lustful thoughts or urges before that. Covid has somehow stolen my sex from me.

This afternoon, listening with half an ear to a silly rom com audio book, I heard the narrator tell her friend, who has been moping about a bad breakup, that she just needs to have a fling, find “someone strong to grip your hands over your head and just pound into you.” Apparently my body was listening closer than my brain, because my pussy actually twitched. I had to pause the book and go back 30 seconds to listen again.

Yup, there it was, that twitch.

It’s been such a long time since I’ve daydreamed about cock. I texted Viper, told him the situation. “How about we just fuck,” I said. We haven’t seen each other in…a month? And as he is very very serious about the whole SiP thing, we probably won’t for another month or more. “No words, no kissing, no clothes off, keep our masks on – just fucking. Cock, meet cunt. That’s it.” As safe as safe can be.

It was a no go. (But now that image is in my mind and it is somehow hot.)

“Okay, how about we have a mini vid chat booty call tomorrow night after bedtime. You, me, our laptops and my big strap-on cock, the one I’ve never used on anyone, not even myself. Big and white and veiny. I just want to fuck myself silly.”

Adam stays over on nights he’s off work – that now means Sun/Mon/Tues & Wed nights. I really need at least one more night alone, like tonight. I really want cock tonight. Cock-attached-to-a-human, preferably, but…I don’t want to ask Adam. He doesn’t have the kind of energy I need, the ferocious, pounding, taking, gasping, fucking energy.

“You could go fuck yourself on the bathroom floor while he’s asleep,” says Viper. “That’s really kind of hot, actually. Take a picture for me if you do.”

I thought about it, actually. Except – all my sex toys are in the boxes under the bed on the side Adam sleeps on. How did I fail at that small detail of organizing?? Tomorrow I rearrange the underbed.

But for tonight…I guess I just dream.


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