Happy holidays from me to you! I admit to being uncomfortable with wishing a merry Christmas – not for anyone else’s sensibilities, but for my own. It irritates the piss out of me to celebrate something that was stolen from another culture in order to erase it, although to be honest pretty much all Christian/religious traditions probably ride on the back of others’ traditions, so…oh well. I’ll use the holiday season (whether you’re celebrating the Winter Solstice, Saturnalia or a special human’s birth) to make/buy gifts (my favorite part of the holiday – giving presents!), consume delicious meals, spend time with loved ones…and maybe (just maybe)…get my kink on a bit!
This is a very different holiday for me than those in the past. Last night was the first time in many, many years that I spent the night alone. I was about to write that it will probably be the first of many, but I don’t necessarily believe that. If I wasn’t house/dog sitting for my sister this year, Adam and I would have spent the night together, as we usually have in the past. Christmas Eve has always been a fun “parents/adults only” night, spent last minute shopping, wrapping gifts, having holiday beverages and finally, at the end of the night, unwrapping each other’s gifts. (My children traditionally spend the evening at their grandmother’s on their father’s side’s house.) As it was, Adam and I did spend a good portion of the evening together anyway, until I had to go home to take care of my sister’s two Great Danes and he to take care of our own pup, Felix. Next year – unless I go out of town, which could happen – we’ll be at my new house together.
I wonder if I will feel the need to leave town next year. I’ve taken myself off for holidays for the past three years, ever since the first year of my relationship with V, when I realized that holidays were going to be difficult because I wouldn’t be able to spend ANY of them with him – every holiday, Jewish or Christian or made up, was a “special day” that he couldn’t spend with me. It was for “family,” which of course didn’t include me; and certainly didn’t allow for he and I to have time together apart from his family. (All except for New Year’s Eve, but that was its own particular misery every year.) For a play partner, that would have been fine; for a supposed poly partner, a life partner, not so much. So, I tried to make sure I simply wasn’t around for any of them: problem solved. (Not really, it was terribly hurtful to me that that he accepted that as the status quo.) Anyway, I digress…
In spite of being alone, last night wasn’t awful. Or even bad. I curled up with a book and snuggled down in bed and slept like a rock until I woke up this morning and decided, hey, I’m going to do something special for the blog. And myself, since I haven’t felt kinky or sexy in quite a while.
Once upon a time W and I created kinky posts based on the Twelve Days of Christmas, calling them the “Twelve Days of Kinkmas,” a meme I think I got from Molly originally. (You can see the original posts, from 2012 and 2013 [good lord where has all the time gone?] over here at Kink & Poly. I tried to get V interested in some of the tomfoolery a couple times, but it never caught with him, for whatever reason. This year, I almost let it pass by, but then, on impulse, I asked my Canadian man (The Canadian) if he might be interested in helping me out with it. (I had originally asked my photographer friend Allan (The Photographer) to do a themed photo shoot for it, but all the things happened and time got away from me, and here I am Christmas Day – Day 1 of the Twelve Days – and we didn’t get it done.)
The Canadian was more than happy to play along when I told him about it, and assist me in debauching the holiday, lol. After some deliberation, I came up with The Twelve Tasks of Kinkmas. Each day for the twelve days of Christmas, from Dec. 26 – Jan. 6, I’ll complete a task that he has set and post about it here. It should be a fun game to take my mind off all the everything going on, and maybe provide some stress relief, which I can also definitely use. And maybe give ya’ll some holiday cheer, Kinkmas-style, too!
The Twelve Tasks of Kinkmas – Day 1
Task 1: Wrap yourself up in sexy lingerie and a bow and offer yourself up.